That word can mean many things, I won’t go into all of them,
although I do believe that belief in a higher power without any proof is a
remarkable thing, I won’t remark on that today. Instead I want to focus on the
self. Belief in the self is the most important thing anyone can achieve. Without
it we are full of doubt and confusion, with it we can reach for the stars and
even catch them. It stands to reason, then that without belief in ourselves the
human race would have accomplished very little. Why try for something if you
believe yourself incapable of ever achieving it? Daring to dream, to imagine is
what being human is all about. It doesn’t matter what the dream is, what
matters is that we hold on to it and strive to make it a reality. Our beliefs
guide us through life. We come to believe in others too, sometimes we are disappointed
by them, but sometimes our beliefs come to fruit and we are proud to say we
always believed in them. Our belief in ourselves is our confidence. Those who
have lost their confidence are usually led by fear, it steps up very fast to
take confidences place and we, us gullible human beings, we let it take command
of us so easily. Belief in the fear that controls you will stop you from
attempting anything new and you will eventually stop dreaming, stop imagining.
Stop living. You will be just a shadow of your former self, moving, breathing,
but not really there, just a waste of space.
I have seen this happen to many people, and I do feel that it is happening to
me too. My confidence has been stripped from me and I don’t know how to get it
back. I no longer have belief in myself. Well in some things I do. I have done
many brave and reckless things, and I’m still stupid enough to get up on stage,
however, what I don’t have belief in anymore is success. Fear tells me I am
meant to fail, it tells me that because so many times other people have said it
to me. I no longer need them to say it anymore. I hear it automatically. Like salivating
at a bell I have allowed myself to fall into this hole of despair and now it
seems so very deep that I fear I can’t climb out. I know I must do it on my
own, I can’t ask for help or I would forever think that I only escaped because
of others, my confidence would not be restored and that is what I want. I want
to believe. I want to believe in me once more, like I know I once did before,
but I don’t know how.
